Hi again.... I have another mommy with a question on how to switch to a sippy cup! Hope you guys can help her out! Have a good Thursday!
I need some advice on switching my daughter to a sippy cup from the bottle. We have gotten the Nuby ones, but she still won’t take them. Thanks!Stacie
I would suggest using a sippy cup with a silicone lid first. These are most like a bottle. I started by daughter on one at 6 months and by 9months she had the hang of it. Carmen
Hi Stacie. How old is your daughter? I would suggest just taking your time with this move. Their bottle is a security more than anything. I tired taking my daughter off her sippy cup just cold turkey and one day the sitter called me at work and asked me to bring a bottle. My daughter was apparently just beside herself. Maybe start by just having the sippy cup for lunch. If she doesn't drink, she just doesn't drink. Eventually thirst will win out over hard headedness and she will figure it out. Maybe you could just have one out all day with water or juice in it. If she is in a good mood and playing, she may pick it up and figure it out on her own. If the juice in there is really good, she will keep sipping. I hope this helps! Cindy
This is in response the sippy cup question -- I have a 10 month old daughter and our pediatrician told us to take our time with the transition from bottle to cup and to start by offering water in a sippy cup in the afternoons. She said that it is alright if my daughter plays around with it and gets the hang of it gradually. The pediatrician was not a big fan of the abrupt switch and said that some babies take longer than others to get comfortable with a cup. Don't stress out! TGIF, Moms!
Hi :)! You've gotten some great suggestions so far! You may want to try a "sippy" with a "pop up" straw if the others don't work out for you. Try not to stress. I promise your little one will be off of the bottle before you know it! They grow up so quickly!
Thursday, May 29, 2008
Wednesday, May 28, 2008
Anger/Hitting/Throwing
Hi Ladies! Here is another really great question for you mommies! Thanks again to everyone for reading!!
could you post a blog asking for advice about how other moms have dealt with the anger/hitting/throwing issue???i have tried reading magazines and doing internet research, but they don't really give good, realistic advice...i'd love to hear what some other moms have to say about the subject.
Hello, Mommy. I am interested in your post, I too have a child that went through quite a stage with hitting and throwing. I am unsure how old your child is or what your view is on discipline, but I will tell you what worked for us:
My son was about 2 when he started to get really disruptive. He would act out at home, or in public places. It became very frustrating for my husband and I. When we had our second child when he was about 2 1/2, he mellowed out some. One thing I think helped was that we moved him out of his crib for his brother. So we made a big deal out of him now being a big boy and big boys do not hit or throw. I also started potty training him, which he didn't catch on to for another 6 months but he would go on the potty and he was very proud of the big boy behavior. It was a reward for him just to really feel like a big boy and get to do big boy things. However, he was still into hitting and throwing objects (he never threw himself down just threw other things - and not at anyone specifically, just to show he was upset). Needless to say, we had to figure out something he understood. Time out just didn't work for him. Taking toys away didn't work. He didn't seem to understand the concept. I finally tired just putting him in the middle of his toddler bed, and shutting the door (this was when he would demonstrate the negative behavior at home). I did that because his doctor told us that negative attention is still better than no attention for kids. So we basically cut him off from everyone for 5 minutes. It was lonely for him in there, and so he finally quit. When we were in public, I would take him to the car and let him sit (me standing outside of the car of course, not inside with him). It may seem harsh to some people, but it was all we could figure. Once he learned that we were serious about removing him from the situation he eventually quit doing the behavior that would make us take him out. It took a while though, I remember thinking that it was not working. My main reason in being so serious with him was that I lived in fear that he would throw something that might hit his little brother. I was also tired of getting stared at in public, he is a sweet child, I was tired of people judging me and him in their heads! Keep us posted! Katherine
I have a response for the Anger/Hitting/Throwing mom. Actually, I more so want to know how old her child is. Also, what types of behavior specifically is she/he showing? Is she/he actually angry at something or just trying to get attention? Anger is a strong word. I have a little boy that throws things, but I often brush it off as a boy just being a boy. I wonder if I am "in the dark". I want to hear more from her. Thanks!
Here is a little bit of follow up information I got from Stacey:
could you post a blog asking for advice about how other moms have dealt with the anger/hitting/throwing issue???i have tried reading magazines and doing internet research, but they don't really give good, realistic advice...i'd love to hear what some other moms have to say about the subject.
Hello, Mommy. I am interested in your post, I too have a child that went through quite a stage with hitting and throwing. I am unsure how old your child is or what your view is on discipline, but I will tell you what worked for us:
My son was about 2 when he started to get really disruptive. He would act out at home, or in public places. It became very frustrating for my husband and I. When we had our second child when he was about 2 1/2, he mellowed out some. One thing I think helped was that we moved him out of his crib for his brother. So we made a big deal out of him now being a big boy and big boys do not hit or throw. I also started potty training him, which he didn't catch on to for another 6 months but he would go on the potty and he was very proud of the big boy behavior. It was a reward for him just to really feel like a big boy and get to do big boy things. However, he was still into hitting and throwing objects (he never threw himself down just threw other things - and not at anyone specifically, just to show he was upset). Needless to say, we had to figure out something he understood. Time out just didn't work for him. Taking toys away didn't work. He didn't seem to understand the concept. I finally tired just putting him in the middle of his toddler bed, and shutting the door (this was when he would demonstrate the negative behavior at home). I did that because his doctor told us that negative attention is still better than no attention for kids. So we basically cut him off from everyone for 5 minutes. It was lonely for him in there, and so he finally quit. When we were in public, I would take him to the car and let him sit (me standing outside of the car of course, not inside with him). It may seem harsh to some people, but it was all we could figure. Once he learned that we were serious about removing him from the situation he eventually quit doing the behavior that would make us take him out. It took a while though, I remember thinking that it was not working. My main reason in being so serious with him was that I lived in fear that he would throw something that might hit his little brother. I was also tired of getting stared at in public, he is a sweet child, I was tired of people judging me and him in their heads! Keep us posted! Katherine
I have a response for the Anger/Hitting/Throwing mom. Actually, I more so want to know how old her child is. Also, what types of behavior specifically is she/he showing? Is she/he actually angry at something or just trying to get attention? Anger is a strong word. I have a little boy that throws things, but I often brush it off as a boy just being a boy. I wonder if I am "in the dark". I want to hear more from her. Thanks!
Here is a little bit of follow up information I got from Stacey:
my son is almost 2 1/2. the hitting and throwing is almost always done out of anger and/or frustration. occasionally he will throw things in a playful fashion, which isn't quite as upsetting to me as when he throws his cup down because it's "white milk" instead of "chocolate milk" or whatever. and the hitting is always when he's mad, too. actually, back when he was about 18 months old, he started this behaviour with hair pulling. if he was mad,or if i had to pick him up to take him somewhere he didn't want to go, or whatever, he would pull my hair as hard as he could while he was throwing his little fit.i'm sure i didn't help the situation by giving him a reaction! i know you are just supposed to ignore them when they act up this way. he finally grew out of the hair pulling, but now it's been replaced by hitting. it's not always that he is TRYING to hit ME, it's just that he thrashes his arms at hits at anything in his way.i do not believe in hitting him back or spanking.we've tried time outs, which do help calm him down, but it just hasn't taught him not to do it again! the good news is, i don't think he does this at daycare (i'm sure we would have heard about this). i know kids will act up at home or with their parents because they feel safe and secure and they are pushing their limits.and i also know that he is using hitting/throwing as a way to release anger or frustration because he doesn't have the vocabulary yet to express how mad he is. (or maybe he doesn't even understand the concept???)anyway, it is frustrating and i know kids will be kids and 2 year olds will be 2 year olds...but i want this behaviour to stop!!!thanks for your feedback! -stacey
Stacey, I think the first mom is really on to something. I think maybe that one thing you might want to think about is turning your precious little man (and my precious little nephew) into a "big boy". Since time out doesn't seem to be working, what if you give him more responsibility. Make him more accountable for his behavior in sorts. At 2-3 they really can understand things like the big boy bed being a big deal. But if he can't act like a big boy (and big boys don't hit or throw) then he can't be in the big boy bed. Or give him a big boy toy or sorts - maybe a big boy pool (just one of those small baby pools) since it is hot outside. But if he can't act like a big boy then he can't play in the big boy pool.... Or have a fun big boy day - something that he really enjoys doing with you, and if he throws or hits, he doesn't get to go. I know with my daughter we made check marks on a paper and put it in the kitchen - she really had to earn a toy by getting check marks in each box. We showed her what a check mark was. Maybe you could purchase a semi-large (doesn't have to be expensive, just large in size always makes them "want" it a little more I think) toy and make him go a day without hitting to get a check. When he gets a certian number of checks, he gets the toy. I think he would understand that as long as you talked about it a lot and put the toy where he could see it. Those are just a few ideas!! Awbs
Here are a few more recent emails from Moms! These are great, ladies, keep sending them!!! Awbs
Hi Stacie. I read what you had to say about your child. Do you think some of it could be just "boys being boys"? Or actually, just a "child being a child". He knows that hitting is not right, because he doesn't do it at daycare. So maybe he is just trying to see what he can get away with at home? Have you tried just ignoring it? Or just saying, "we don't hit" and move on? It just sounds like to me that he is just being 2 since he doesn't do it at daycare. Hope things get better! Katherine
I think all 2 year olds throw fits and he will grow out of it. He isn't going to be hitting when he goes to college. Just keep doing what you think is best, obviously you have done a good job thus far or you wouldn't be reaching out trying to make life better for him.
Friday, May 23, 2008
Email Update
A reader suggested that I send out emails when I have posted new information on the blog.... I don't mind a bit doing that, but you must send me your email first. I have a few emails from folks I know read, but I am sure there are a few people who read and don't post anything.
So, if you read and want an email that says I have posted something new - please send me a short email so I can add you to the list serve!
I hope everyone has a safe and fun Memorial Day weekend!
Awbs
So, if you read and want an email that says I have posted something new - please send me a short email so I can add you to the list serve!
I hope everyone has a safe and fun Memorial Day weekend!
Awbs
Thursday, May 22, 2008
Finding Time in the Day
I got this email yesterday from Rene who wants to make sure she isn't the only mom in this position! Let her know what you think!
Hi, I am looking for some info from other moms about time. What I mean by this is I feel like I never have time to do it all. Can you do it all? I only work part time, and that is from home. I have two children, 4 & 2. I feel like I never accomplish anything.
I also have a major guilt problem within myself. If I go work out or hire a babysitter, I guilt myself. Even when I say before that I won't. Like, why can't I drop the kids off for awhile and not feel guilty about it? I NEED to go work out at least 3 times a week, but I feel like it is time taken away from them. I don't know how to get over that, or should I just wait until their are in school to do things like that for myself?
Any advice for helpful words anyone has would be so appreciated. I guess I just can't seem to give up wanting a life for myself as well as a clean house as well as spending time with my beautiful babies, as well as having time with my husband..... Thanks!
This comment came in yesterday - and it is so true:
just remember.. everyone needs a little alone time.. ESPECIALLY moms!! If Mom's not happy.. no one is!
Hi, I am looking for some info from other moms about time. What I mean by this is I feel like I never have time to do it all. Can you do it all? I only work part time, and that is from home. I have two children, 4 & 2. I feel like I never accomplish anything.
I also have a major guilt problem within myself. If I go work out or hire a babysitter, I guilt myself. Even when I say before that I won't. Like, why can't I drop the kids off for awhile and not feel guilty about it? I NEED to go work out at least 3 times a week, but I feel like it is time taken away from them. I don't know how to get over that, or should I just wait until their are in school to do things like that for myself?
Any advice for helpful words anyone has would be so appreciated. I guess I just can't seem to give up wanting a life for myself as well as a clean house as well as spending time with my beautiful babies, as well as having time with my husband..... Thanks!
This comment came in yesterday - and it is so true:
just remember.. everyone needs a little alone time.. ESPECIALLY moms!! If Mom's not happy.. no one is!
Tuesday, May 20, 2008
Best Graphic Designer I know
Here is an ad for a new business my cousin has started! Mention that you saw the ad on this site and she might give you a little discount (because she loves me)! She is probably the most talented memeber of our family. Minus my brother who can play a mean guitar.... And her brother who takes excellent pictures.... And my other brother who could charm a snake..... Maybe I am the only one without an exceptional talent......
Thursday, May 15, 2008
Trying to become a Mom
I had not gotten an email in about a week, so I was going to post some random thoughts of my own today. Consider yourselves saved..... I got this email from a young woman who is trying to become a Mommy and wants some advice! Hope you guys can help her - most of us have been in this position at some point!
My husband and I are actually trying to get pregnant. I quit taking the pill March 1st. I was actually one of those that thought it would happen right away. We are both healthy and young. All of my friends with children talk about how it didn't take any time at all, it happened the first month, etc. Well that's not happening with me. The past two months we have been actively trying. I am always looking on Web MD and BabyCenter.com to figure out my ovulation calculator. This past month we actually tried to cover all of our "dates" and for a few days thought we might be pregnant, but no, little thing called a period had to come. I'm interested to hear stories from all the other mothers out there on their experience trying to get pregnant. Like how long did it take? Any tricks? Am I just crazy for already thinking I'm going to have trouble?
I have decided this month to not even look at the calendar, just try naturally and just wait and see what happens. Charting and waiting and taking pregnancy test after pregnancy test just stresses me out! Thanks!
I got this email in response to the trying to conceive question. I know there are a lot more of you ladies out there who have been in this position, so please give a little encouragement/information if you have time!!
This is in response to the young lady who is trying to get pregnant. I went through the same situation. Although I can't offer up any "tricks" I assure you that you are not crazy for thinking there is a problem. Most likely there isn't, however I jumped to the same conclusion. It took my husband and I exactly 6 months to conceive. I have no idea why one month over the other 5 we had been trying, but it finally worked. We now have a beautiful little girl. I am 31 and he is 33.
It is hard to do, but try not to get discouraged. Some women's bodies take time to get adjusted after being on the pill. If you were on it for a long time, it may just be taking time to adjust. I am sure it is not that way for everyone on the pill, but all women's bodies are so different. Talk to your doctor, though, and make sure he or she will work with you. Explain that you are just nervous and see what his game plan will be if you don't conceive within the next 6 months. At least then you will have a plan!
The best advice I got when going through that situation was to relax and try to have fun instead of making it into a chore! Good luck!
This is for the lady looking to become a mom. I wanted to express to her that she is not alone. I have been in her spot before. I am sure many other women have as well. From my own personal experience, I can tell her that sometimes it just takes time. I got pregnant on our 6th month of trying. I was ready to schedule a fertility apppointment, but it just took time. It stinks to hear, but sometimes it just does.
If you have regular cycles and have never had any major problems, I would encourage you to try as best you can to relax and wait it out. Your doctor will direct you after a year of trying as to what to do next. Wishing you many fertile moments in the future!
My husband and I are actually trying to get pregnant. I quit taking the pill March 1st. I was actually one of those that thought it would happen right away. We are both healthy and young. All of my friends with children talk about how it didn't take any time at all, it happened the first month, etc. Well that's not happening with me. The past two months we have been actively trying. I am always looking on Web MD and BabyCenter.com to figure out my ovulation calculator. This past month we actually tried to cover all of our "dates" and for a few days thought we might be pregnant, but no, little thing called a period had to come. I'm interested to hear stories from all the other mothers out there on their experience trying to get pregnant. Like how long did it take? Any tricks? Am I just crazy for already thinking I'm going to have trouble?
I have decided this month to not even look at the calendar, just try naturally and just wait and see what happens. Charting and waiting and taking pregnancy test after pregnancy test just stresses me out! Thanks!
I got this email in response to the trying to conceive question. I know there are a lot more of you ladies out there who have been in this position, so please give a little encouragement/information if you have time!!
This is in response to the young lady who is trying to get pregnant. I went through the same situation. Although I can't offer up any "tricks" I assure you that you are not crazy for thinking there is a problem. Most likely there isn't, however I jumped to the same conclusion. It took my husband and I exactly 6 months to conceive. I have no idea why one month over the other 5 we had been trying, but it finally worked. We now have a beautiful little girl. I am 31 and he is 33.
It is hard to do, but try not to get discouraged. Some women's bodies take time to get adjusted after being on the pill. If you were on it for a long time, it may just be taking time to adjust. I am sure it is not that way for everyone on the pill, but all women's bodies are so different. Talk to your doctor, though, and make sure he or she will work with you. Explain that you are just nervous and see what his game plan will be if you don't conceive within the next 6 months. At least then you will have a plan!
The best advice I got when going through that situation was to relax and try to have fun instead of making it into a chore! Good luck!
This is for the lady looking to become a mom. I wanted to express to her that she is not alone. I have been in her spot before. I am sure many other women have as well. From my own personal experience, I can tell her that sometimes it just takes time. I got pregnant on our 6th month of trying. I was ready to schedule a fertility apppointment, but it just took time. It stinks to hear, but sometimes it just does.
If you have regular cycles and have never had any major problems, I would encourage you to try as best you can to relax and wait it out. Your doctor will direct you after a year of trying as to what to do next. Wishing you many fertile moments in the future!
Sunday, May 11, 2008
Happy Mother's Day
Happy Mother's Day to all mom's.... What a gift you have given to this world. May you all have a day filled with love and relaxation.
Thursday, May 8, 2008
Best Advice
I wanted to take a moment to share the best advice I was given when I was pregnant with my daughter. A good friend told me the following two things and I have tried to share them with others:
1) Don't be above anything. You may lay one set of "rules" out for yourself when expecting - how you think you are going to do things. When the time comes, don't be above anything. Try everything you can to have peace within yourself and your home. I can remember thinking of this when I let my daughter sleep in her carrier for the first two weeks of her life. It was the only way my husband and I could sleep. So I put her in the carrier right next to our bed, and it worked!!
2) Everything looks better in the daylight. When you have a new baby, the night times seem neverending. I can remember praying for 6am because then it seemed like someone else in the world was awake and I wasn't the only one. It is so hard in the middle of the night. It does end, quicker than you think - soon you will be sleeping (most nights) all of the way through again.
Life can be tough when you are recovering from birth. I always found it amazing that God laid such an enormous responsibility soley on women. What an honor. Here we are, having our bodies recover from uone of the most difficult things it will ever do ("cook" and then deliever another human) and if you are breastfeeding, then at night your spouse can only help out so much. Even if you aren't, they still can only do so much. My husband and I would rotate feedings, he would do one and then I would do the next. That way we could both get at least 2-3 hours of sleep at a time.
Having a child is one of the most exciting, but tiring things you will ever do. Like Angie noted, it goes so quickly. It might not feel like it during the difficult times, but truly, it does.
Thanks to everyone who has given so much advice - this is really helping ladies out there and I feel honored that you each would take the time to read this and respond! Let's keep it going!!
1) Don't be above anything. You may lay one set of "rules" out for yourself when expecting - how you think you are going to do things. When the time comes, don't be above anything. Try everything you can to have peace within yourself and your home. I can remember thinking of this when I let my daughter sleep in her carrier for the first two weeks of her life. It was the only way my husband and I could sleep. So I put her in the carrier right next to our bed, and it worked!!
2) Everything looks better in the daylight. When you have a new baby, the night times seem neverending. I can remember praying for 6am because then it seemed like someone else in the world was awake and I wasn't the only one. It is so hard in the middle of the night. It does end, quicker than you think - soon you will be sleeping (most nights) all of the way through again.
Life can be tough when you are recovering from birth. I always found it amazing that God laid such an enormous responsibility soley on women. What an honor. Here we are, having our bodies recover from uone of the most difficult things it will ever do ("cook" and then deliever another human) and if you are breastfeeding, then at night your spouse can only help out so much. Even if you aren't, they still can only do so much. My husband and I would rotate feedings, he would do one and then I would do the next. That way we could both get at least 2-3 hours of sleep at a time.
Having a child is one of the most exciting, but tiring things you will ever do. Like Angie noted, it goes so quickly. It might not feel like it during the difficult times, but truly, it does.
Thanks to everyone who has given so much advice - this is really helping ladies out there and I feel honored that you each would take the time to read this and respond! Let's keep it going!!
Tuesday, May 6, 2008
Not a mom yet
Here is an email I received from Cindy who is pregnant right now and having nervous jitters about the birthing process! Thanks moms, for helping answer her questions.
Hi there. I am 8 months pregnant and should have my baby in the next month. I am very nervous about the process. I have no idea what to expect, and therefore feel as if I can't enjoy the remainder of my pregnancy because I live in fear.
So, if you don't mind answering a few of my questions, I would be greatful. If I have a c-section, what is the recovery time? Do you feel anything during the surgery? I have heard it is very tough to breastfeed if you have a c-section, is that true?
If I have a vaginal birth, what is the recovery time? Do you feel any different after you heal? Also, do you feel anything if you have an epidural?
Does anyone have any other suggestions or helpful advice for a first time mom who has no idea what to expect after I bring my baby home?
Thank you! Cindy
Cindy, here are two really great replies and a little info from me....
The first repsonse is from Stacie - she had a c-section:
Cindy, I has a c-section and I wanted to share with you my experience. My daughter was 4 weeks early (so have your hospital stuff ready cause baby can come anytime). I went into the doctors at 34 weeks feeling great only to have high blood pressure and we delivered two weeks later. I knew I would be having a c-section due to the fact that I have a bi-cornate uterus, but we had not been scheduled yet, so this was a surprise. We arrived at the hospital at noon for a supposed delivery time of 2pm, but due to emergencies I did not deliver until 5:11pm, so I had a little anticipation, but was relatively calm. They wheeled us back and my husband stayed behind to get ready (scrubs), I was given an epidural without him there. The staff with me was great and talked me through everything. I couldn’t feel a thing, my arms were even numb, which can happen. I felt slight pulling, but that was it. Word of warning though, do not look too closely at the lights in the delivery room, they have a mirror like effect and you can see what they are doing to you, so don’t look if you are the queasy type. The surgery took no time at all, and I was quickly in the recovery room. I had to stay there until I could move both legs, about an hour total. Take this time to rest, you will need it. I was in the hospital 4 days and suggest staying as long as your insurance allows when you have a c-section. I was supposed to get up at least every 4 hours and walk around, which I did except one time when we had a lot of visitors. They tell you to do this so you don’t get stiff, and it is important to do so. I was told I couldn’t drive for 4 weeks or until I could slam on the brakes hard and look over both shoulders with no pain. This took about 3 ½ weeks. I felt rather normal by 2 weeks, just couldn’t drive. I think the key is moving around enough and getting rest.
As for breastfeeding, I successfully breastfed my daughter for six months and she pretty much weaned herself. I was very scared I was going to fail because my daughter was in the NICU, but we gave her every drop of milk I had and supplemented. It took a week for her to be completely off formula. I think if you do not deliver a preemie that you can easily be successful. My advice is to have a good breast pump and use it. Listen to the lactation consultants and do what you feel is right. Hope this helps!
The next is from Angie who had a vaginal birth:
Cindy-I can so relate! I was a nervous wreck about what it would feel like to have a baby. So much so that in our birthing classes I got sick and had to leave before I passed out! I KNEW there had to be a better way to have a child other than vaginally or c-section! However, as time grew closer, something changed in my mind…it became “I don’t CARE how you get this child out, just get her out!” Honestly, I think Mother Nature has a way of preparing your mind before it’s time to deliver! I ended up having a vaginal delivery, and honestly, it wasn’t that bad. Obviously, it’s not the most pleasurable experience, but you make it through. Your body just kind of takes over. I didn’t have too much trouble recovering either. The hospital gave me ice packs to put in my underwear and I wanted to have a million of those! I would say I was sore for about a week to two weeks. I did feel differently for a while, maybe a month or so. I wasn’t sore anymore, I just felt different. I am not one to ask about the epidural. I had one, but it didn’t work so well. I felt most everything, but most say with an epidural, they didn’t feel anything. Take or leave this advice, but I know myself and I also ask for some extra pain drugs, because I ALWAYS get sick when I feel major pain…so they gave me some good doses of phenergan! (SP?) LOVED IT! IT helped me relax and sleep through a lot of my labor until it was time to push.
As far as advice for a new mom??! So many things. 1) Breastfeeding…it’s tough, but it gets better. Make sure to ask for some cream to rub on your nipples for the first few days as they will be chapped. 2) IT GETS EASIER! The first few nights/days were really hard and I thought to myself, “What have I done?!?!” But I promise it gets easier. 3) One day at a time… I once heard the difference between “good” parents and “bad” parents is “good” parents only *think* of throwing their child out the window. 4) It’s okay if you don’t know everything…that’s why we have AWBS! J 5) Relax and enjoy every moment…time goes so quickly.
Cindy, I too had a vaginal birth. Like Angie - I agree with those ice pack things! What a blessing those where. Ask them when you leave for a few extra. Take it slow recovering, I found that I rushed it with my first child and when I went for my 6 week check up, I was not totally healed yet.
I was very scared about a vaginal birth, but after having my first one, I loved it. There is something so awesome about seeing a child come out of your body. I didn't want to hold either of them right after they came out, I was too exhausted and just needed a minute to process what had just happened, but it was still an awesome experience. I had an epidural with both - my first I actually felt labor pains, my second I was induced and felt nothing. As far as an epidural, I felt no pain or anything, but did feel pressure. Especially when they were sewing me back up, I could feel the tugging. It was the worst part of the entire thing, which tells you how smoothly things went for me.
Angie and Stacie both make great points about "motherhood". On another note, let me add that you are indeed already a mother. Once you get that positive sign on that pregnancy test, you have made it to motherhood, no matter what happens after that. I did not breastfeed either of mine. I tried with my daughter, but it was more stressful on me and her than worth it. I truly thing it is personal choice and feeling. Some women love it, some hate it, just see what you like. Don't pressure yourself to do it, though. If you hate it, make a decision for your sanity and don't feel guilty about it. One thing Mommies do a lot is make ourselves feel guilty about things we shouldn't. You do what makes you feel comfortable and what you think is best for your child.
Good luck, I hope you let us know how it goes!
Hi there. I am 8 months pregnant and should have my baby in the next month. I am very nervous about the process. I have no idea what to expect, and therefore feel as if I can't enjoy the remainder of my pregnancy because I live in fear.
So, if you don't mind answering a few of my questions, I would be greatful. If I have a c-section, what is the recovery time? Do you feel anything during the surgery? I have heard it is very tough to breastfeed if you have a c-section, is that true?
If I have a vaginal birth, what is the recovery time? Do you feel any different after you heal? Also, do you feel anything if you have an epidural?
Does anyone have any other suggestions or helpful advice for a first time mom who has no idea what to expect after I bring my baby home?
Thank you! Cindy
Cindy, here are two really great replies and a little info from me....
The first repsonse is from Stacie - she had a c-section:
Cindy, I has a c-section and I wanted to share with you my experience. My daughter was 4 weeks early (so have your hospital stuff ready cause baby can come anytime). I went into the doctors at 34 weeks feeling great only to have high blood pressure and we delivered two weeks later. I knew I would be having a c-section due to the fact that I have a bi-cornate uterus, but we had not been scheduled yet, so this was a surprise. We arrived at the hospital at noon for a supposed delivery time of 2pm, but due to emergencies I did not deliver until 5:11pm, so I had a little anticipation, but was relatively calm. They wheeled us back and my husband stayed behind to get ready (scrubs), I was given an epidural without him there. The staff with me was great and talked me through everything. I couldn’t feel a thing, my arms were even numb, which can happen. I felt slight pulling, but that was it. Word of warning though, do not look too closely at the lights in the delivery room, they have a mirror like effect and you can see what they are doing to you, so don’t look if you are the queasy type. The surgery took no time at all, and I was quickly in the recovery room. I had to stay there until I could move both legs, about an hour total. Take this time to rest, you will need it. I was in the hospital 4 days and suggest staying as long as your insurance allows when you have a c-section. I was supposed to get up at least every 4 hours and walk around, which I did except one time when we had a lot of visitors. They tell you to do this so you don’t get stiff, and it is important to do so. I was told I couldn’t drive for 4 weeks or until I could slam on the brakes hard and look over both shoulders with no pain. This took about 3 ½ weeks. I felt rather normal by 2 weeks, just couldn’t drive. I think the key is moving around enough and getting rest.
As for breastfeeding, I successfully breastfed my daughter for six months and she pretty much weaned herself. I was very scared I was going to fail because my daughter was in the NICU, but we gave her every drop of milk I had and supplemented. It took a week for her to be completely off formula. I think if you do not deliver a preemie that you can easily be successful. My advice is to have a good breast pump and use it. Listen to the lactation consultants and do what you feel is right. Hope this helps!
The next is from Angie who had a vaginal birth:
Cindy-I can so relate! I was a nervous wreck about what it would feel like to have a baby. So much so that in our birthing classes I got sick and had to leave before I passed out! I KNEW there had to be a better way to have a child other than vaginally or c-section! However, as time grew closer, something changed in my mind…it became “I don’t CARE how you get this child out, just get her out!” Honestly, I think Mother Nature has a way of preparing your mind before it’s time to deliver! I ended up having a vaginal delivery, and honestly, it wasn’t that bad. Obviously, it’s not the most pleasurable experience, but you make it through. Your body just kind of takes over. I didn’t have too much trouble recovering either. The hospital gave me ice packs to put in my underwear and I wanted to have a million of those! I would say I was sore for about a week to two weeks. I did feel differently for a while, maybe a month or so. I wasn’t sore anymore, I just felt different. I am not one to ask about the epidural. I had one, but it didn’t work so well. I felt most everything, but most say with an epidural, they didn’t feel anything. Take or leave this advice, but I know myself and I also ask for some extra pain drugs, because I ALWAYS get sick when I feel major pain…so they gave me some good doses of phenergan! (SP?) LOVED IT! IT helped me relax and sleep through a lot of my labor until it was time to push.
As far as advice for a new mom??! So many things. 1) Breastfeeding…it’s tough, but it gets better. Make sure to ask for some cream to rub on your nipples for the first few days as they will be chapped. 2) IT GETS EASIER! The first few nights/days were really hard and I thought to myself, “What have I done?!?!” But I promise it gets easier. 3) One day at a time… I once heard the difference between “good” parents and “bad” parents is “good” parents only *think* of throwing their child out the window. 4) It’s okay if you don’t know everything…that’s why we have AWBS! J 5) Relax and enjoy every moment…time goes so quickly.
Cindy, I too had a vaginal birth. Like Angie - I agree with those ice pack things! What a blessing those where. Ask them when you leave for a few extra. Take it slow recovering, I found that I rushed it with my first child and when I went for my 6 week check up, I was not totally healed yet.
I was very scared about a vaginal birth, but after having my first one, I loved it. There is something so awesome about seeing a child come out of your body. I didn't want to hold either of them right after they came out, I was too exhausted and just needed a minute to process what had just happened, but it was still an awesome experience. I had an epidural with both - my first I actually felt labor pains, my second I was induced and felt nothing. As far as an epidural, I felt no pain or anything, but did feel pressure. Especially when they were sewing me back up, I could feel the tugging. It was the worst part of the entire thing, which tells you how smoothly things went for me.
Angie and Stacie both make great points about "motherhood". On another note, let me add that you are indeed already a mother. Once you get that positive sign on that pregnancy test, you have made it to motherhood, no matter what happens after that. I did not breastfeed either of mine. I tried with my daughter, but it was more stressful on me and her than worth it. I truly thing it is personal choice and feeling. Some women love it, some hate it, just see what you like. Don't pressure yourself to do it, though. If you hate it, make a decision for your sanity and don't feel guilty about it. One thing Mommies do a lot is make ourselves feel guilty about things we shouldn't. You do what makes you feel comfortable and what you think is best for your child.
Good luck, I hope you let us know how it goes!
Sunday, May 4, 2008
Sleeping Issues
Here is a question from Jill, a working mom of an 8 month old. I am sure we can all provide helpful tips in this area - most of us have had sleeping issues with our kids I think!
I am a mother of an 8 month old girl. Up until a few weeks ago, we let our daughter stay up until 9:30 or 10:00 each night. Being a working mom, I didn't want to put her down too early and not get to spend much time with her. Also, she didn't seem tired until late. We rocked her to sleep or pushed her around in a stroller until she fell asleep. But after almost 8 months of this, my husband and I decided to try to start putting her down earlier. We wanted her to learn to put herself to sleep, and we wanted a little more time together just the two of us. Some nights she just rolls over and goes to sleep. But some nights she cries and cries, and we end up picking her up. She'll stay up to like 9:30 or 10:00 on those nights, as opposed to 7:30 or 8:00 on the other nights. Can anyone provide any sleep tips? We've tried the whole routine thing. Baths are out at night because they get her too worked up, but we do nurse and read books before bed. Any other suggestions?
Jill, here is another response from Ada-Marie:
This is a response to Jill's post regarding sleep issues. I HIGHLY recommend the book "Healthy Sleep Habits, Health Child" by Dr. Marc Weissbluth. My daughter is a wayward napper and this book has REALLY helped me with a game plan for her sleeping routine. The book addresses sleep from the newborn stage through the teen years. The book has been a life saver and I still consult it as my daughter gets older. Good luck! Thanks, Ada-Marie
Jill, sleeping is such a tough and individualized thing for kids and parents I believe. If I were you I would probably begin by moving her bedtime back 30 minutes at a time. Maybe she is just confused because some nights she is up later (a good bit later) than other nights. Keep her routine the same, but for a week do 9:30. Then 9. And so on.
Another thing I would try is to let her put herself to sleep. This is were some parents would rather do the stroller thing or whatever. For our first child, we rocked her to sleep with a bottle in her mouth. Which was just what we loved, we loved watching her fall asleep, we loved the rocking, it was great. Until about 9 months. Then we were all just tired, and even when she would wake up in the middle of the night, she would require a bottle to put herself back to sleep.
Put a few toys in her crib, and just let her jab herself to sleep. Our children go to bed religiously at 8, even if they aren't zonked out, they will sit and read (our 3 year old) or play (our 1 year old). The first few times, it was almost sad to me to think about our son in there playing in the crib, but his doctor assured us that if they are cooing and having fun, to let him!
It will be harder on you and your husband than anyone if you change her routine, but she will settle in soon. We let our daughter cry it out two nights in a row when she was 9 months old and she never has had a problem again. I know some parents can't stand the crying out, and it wasn't easy for me, but I love my sleep, so the thought of sleeping through the night was something I needed so very much.
Good luck, please let us know what you decide and how it works out. I would love to hear from other mom's with their suggestions. It will be nice to have that extra time at night to have with your husband too!
I am a mother of an 8 month old girl. Up until a few weeks ago, we let our daughter stay up until 9:30 or 10:00 each night. Being a working mom, I didn't want to put her down too early and not get to spend much time with her. Also, she didn't seem tired until late. We rocked her to sleep or pushed her around in a stroller until she fell asleep. But after almost 8 months of this, my husband and I decided to try to start putting her down earlier. We wanted her to learn to put herself to sleep, and we wanted a little more time together just the two of us. Some nights she just rolls over and goes to sleep. But some nights she cries and cries, and we end up picking her up. She'll stay up to like 9:30 or 10:00 on those nights, as opposed to 7:30 or 8:00 on the other nights. Can anyone provide any sleep tips? We've tried the whole routine thing. Baths are out at night because they get her too worked up, but we do nurse and read books before bed. Any other suggestions?
Jill, here is another response from Ada-Marie:
This is a response to Jill's post regarding sleep issues. I HIGHLY recommend the book "Healthy Sleep Habits, Health Child" by Dr. Marc Weissbluth. My daughter is a wayward napper and this book has REALLY helped me with a game plan for her sleeping routine. The book addresses sleep from the newborn stage through the teen years. The book has been a life saver and I still consult it as my daughter gets older. Good luck! Thanks, Ada-Marie
Jill, sleeping is such a tough and individualized thing for kids and parents I believe. If I were you I would probably begin by moving her bedtime back 30 minutes at a time. Maybe she is just confused because some nights she is up later (a good bit later) than other nights. Keep her routine the same, but for a week do 9:30. Then 9. And so on.
Another thing I would try is to let her put herself to sleep. This is were some parents would rather do the stroller thing or whatever. For our first child, we rocked her to sleep with a bottle in her mouth. Which was just what we loved, we loved watching her fall asleep, we loved the rocking, it was great. Until about 9 months. Then we were all just tired, and even when she would wake up in the middle of the night, she would require a bottle to put herself back to sleep.
Put a few toys in her crib, and just let her jab herself to sleep. Our children go to bed religiously at 8, even if they aren't zonked out, they will sit and read (our 3 year old) or play (our 1 year old). The first few times, it was almost sad to me to think about our son in there playing in the crib, but his doctor assured us that if they are cooing and having fun, to let him!
It will be harder on you and your husband than anyone if you change her routine, but she will settle in soon. We let our daughter cry it out two nights in a row when she was 9 months old and she never has had a problem again. I know some parents can't stand the crying out, and it wasn't easy for me, but I love my sleep, so the thought of sleeping through the night was something I needed so very much.
Good luck, please let us know what you decide and how it works out. I would love to hear from other mom's with their suggestions. It will be nice to have that extra time at night to have with your husband too!
Friday, May 2, 2008
And she gets a prize!
Rebecca, here is a great response to your question! Thanks, Jill! Keep sending them in and I will keep posting! I am sure Rebecca is just thrilled to know there are other people who can relate!
This is in response to the mother of an 8 week old baby who was exhausted.
I am a working mother of an 8 month old girl, and unfortunately, even after 8 months, I am still exhausted. The good news is- things do get easier. You get into a routine, learn to read your baby, and get used to being tired. My advice is to start small. Leave your baby for an hour and go do something for yourself. Pedicure? Trip to the gym? Or even better, have someone watch your baby while you take a nap. Before I went back to work, I worked up to leaving my daughter all day. First an hour a day, then a couple hours, and so on. It made things easier when the big day came to return to work. Of course, leave your baby with someone you trust. Overall, just be proud of yourself for small accomplishments and try to rest whenever you can. So what if the house is a little messy. Use your free time to take care of yourself. Hope this helps!
So I should have had a reward or something for the first mom to send in an email! I have never been so excited to have an email in my inbox!
Please send any advice/comments to me at: askawbs@gmail.com and I will post them under Rebecca's question. Here is what she writes:
Hello. This seems like a great forum, I am glad to have been sent the link.
I am a first time mother. My son is 8 weeks old. I am currently exhausted. I feel like it is all I can do to get out of bed in the morning. I am so anxious about returning to work in just 3 short weeks. I do not know how I will cope - the getting up at night, making sure I turn out good product at work, making time for my husband. It all seems so overwhelming and not exactly what they tell you about when you are pregnant.
I basically want to know how all of you mom's deal with it. Even if you don't work - my days are overwhelming right now, the thought of adding a job to the mix seems like too much.
Thank you again, look forward to meeting new people!
Rebecca
This is in response to the mother of an 8 week old baby who was exhausted.
I am a working mother of an 8 month old girl, and unfortunately, even after 8 months, I am still exhausted. The good news is- things do get easier. You get into a routine, learn to read your baby, and get used to being tired. My advice is to start small. Leave your baby for an hour and go do something for yourself. Pedicure? Trip to the gym? Or even better, have someone watch your baby while you take a nap. Before I went back to work, I worked up to leaving my daughter all day. First an hour a day, then a couple hours, and so on. It made things easier when the big day came to return to work. Of course, leave your baby with someone you trust. Overall, just be proud of yourself for small accomplishments and try to rest whenever you can. So what if the house is a little messy. Use your free time to take care of yourself. Hope this helps!
So I should have had a reward or something for the first mom to send in an email! I have never been so excited to have an email in my inbox!
Please send any advice/comments to me at: askawbs@gmail.com and I will post them under Rebecca's question. Here is what she writes:
Hello. This seems like a great forum, I am glad to have been sent the link.
I am a first time mother. My son is 8 weeks old. I am currently exhausted. I feel like it is all I can do to get out of bed in the morning. I am so anxious about returning to work in just 3 short weeks. I do not know how I will cope - the getting up at night, making sure I turn out good product at work, making time for my husband. It all seems so overwhelming and not exactly what they tell you about when you are pregnant.
I basically want to know how all of you mom's deal with it. Even if you don't work - my days are overwhelming right now, the thought of adding a job to the mix seems like too much.
Thank you again, look forward to meeting new people!
Rebecca
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)